My wardrobe is having a malfunction. I’m
not sure who or what is to blame but I can’t get into any of my
clothes. I’ve listed out the possible culprits below and I'd like your help to find the guilty one.
CULPRIT 1: Are my washing machine programmes too harsh? Some of the
programmes take over an hour of swishing and whirling. It can’t do the clothes
any good at all.
CULPRIT 2: Could it be the fault of the tumble dryer? I can’t deny that
the tumble dryer is getting more than its usual amount of use lately. I know that tumble drying is bad for the environment but it just won’t stop raining and we have a
rather inferior whirly-gig washing line that only dries a couple of items at a
time. [I think I’ve finally convinced Mr A that he has to give over a little of
his precious garden so I can have a decent washing-line like I used to have
before we moved into this garden… I mean house. We did choose the house because
of its garden!]
CULPRIT 3: Is it the quality of the clothes in the shops? There was a
time when you could always rely on certain brands of clothes. Those were in the
days when they were made in England and had the St Michael’s label on them. In
fact, a lot of them were made round the corner from where I grew up in
Leicester. These days I don’t think any of the clothes are UK-made and I’m sure that the
quality has suffered as a result.
CULPRIT 4: Or is it... *hesitates to mention this item as it's so unlikely* could it possibly be... middle–age spread? In the unlikely event that this turns out to be the culprit does it mean that I should be going for
the larger sizes even though I’ve been buying the same size of clothes for over 30 years?
So, which is it to be? Do I need a new washing machine, should
Mr A be giving over some of his garden for a clothes line, should I start
buying my clothes elsewhere and break the clothes-buying habit of a lifetime or
am I getting fat?
Please think carefully before you answer!!!
